Inexorable Love
by miekhead
Summary: As an army threatens to make things personal, Xena finds herself in a sticky situation on a hot morning when her feelings for Gabrielle begin to emerge.
1. The Only Way Forward

Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle, third person POV

Spoilers: The Quest, some of season two but this fits in between The Quest specifically and just after The Price, when I believe they first got together.

Rating: NC-17 (profanity, sexual situations, violence, brutality, angst)

Disclaimer: Xena and Gabrielle do not belong to me, they belong to... whoever's got the rights in this legal yo-yo game. I don't think they even know who Xena belongs to but it could be Universal...or some random millionaire etc.

Notes: This goes on to be pretty angsty, gory and even more graphic. Wrote this one quite a while ago and now picking up back up off the shelf.

As the early Sextilis sun began to rise, a stream of light highlighted two huddled figures sleeping under a light, summer bedroll. The fur was goat, and lacked density in comparison to the heavier, winter skins that they often shared later in the year. Two heads stuck out of the top of the quilting, the darker head belonging to Xena, whose body was spooned up against her blonde companion's back.

Gabrielle sleepily snuggled into her friend's embrace. She felt Xena press herself harder against her backside and instinctively pushed herself into the darker woman's sleep-heated mound, her bare back brushing against the soft curls nestled behind her. Her mind although not fully awake, rocked her body in time with Xena's increasingly thrusting hips. Xena's body was in the same state as the bard's. Her erotic dream was hitting its climax, literally, and her pace picked up. She opened her legs slightly to gain better access to Gabrielle's firm buttocks. With every thrust, a jolt of sensation shot through the small bundle of nerves, erupting through the whole of her body. A drop of moisture trickled down between her legs and glided over the supple skin in front of her. Their shoving against each other became fierce and Xena wrapped her arm around Gabrielle's waist and reached down, cupping the bard's sex.

With gentle fingers, she pressed down on the bard's lower lips, increasing the pressure with each delicate stroke. Probing through the slick moisture found there, she felt the outer muscle swell and firm. Using her middle finger, she languidly swirled it around Gabrielle's opening keeping in time with her companion's back-thrusting. There were no thought processes for either of them and as if working on animal instinct alone, the warrior plunged her finger inside.

Before Gabrielle could even recognize the pleasure soaring through her body, her logical mind realized.

The blonde's eyes snapped open; something was wrong. This was all new.

Xena's sleeping form, oblivious to Gabrielle's startled awakening, continued to bring itself closer to ecstasy until the warrior climaxed suddenly. Gabrielle couldn't move. Her body was in shock and she tensed, aware of the contracting lower muscles as her friend's sex clamped sporadically onto her backside. She had no idea what to do, or to think for that matter.

"Xena?" No reply. 'Oh do not tell me she's sleeping through this', Gabrielle gaped, unsure of what to do about Xena's errant middle finger. She knew she shouldn't feel the pleasure coursing through her body. This was her friend. Her best friend… with whom she was madly, undeniably in love with. But that was no excuse. This was wrong. Just because she felt what she did, didn't mean she needed to act on those feelings, right?

Right?

Her mother had always told her that women only slept with other women to pass the time. It was a 'high society sport' – and "that kind of thing should never be practiced."

She remembered the talk with her mother after curiosity got the better of her during the 'birds and the bees' discussion.

"So could a woman be with another woman?" The curious wide-eyed little girl asked after learning about where lambs came from… and foals… and babies.

Her mother was taken aback by the direct question coming from her nine-year-old eldest daughter. When she finally found her footing, she replied with a brisk, "Gabrielle. I do not know what possessed you to ask that, but there is no such thing as love between two women." Hecuba took a fluttered breath. "Love between a man and a woman is a sacred bond. We are here to please the gods by making children - here to survive and prosper. Sex between women or two men, for that matter, is sinful, disgusting and is purely temptation put there by the Fates." So that was that.

Gabrielle snorted lightly as she thought through a way to wake Xena up. The nine-year-old had grown up to wonder why her mother had been so revolted by something that involved love…

The blonde haired woman sighed inwardly at the pleasure of her dream lover holding her securely, making her feel like she was home.

The warrior had such a tight hold on her friend that Gabrielle's arms were pinned to each side of her body, with one of Xena's hands on her hip, the other buried within her.

Despite wanting this… by the gods she wanted this – her mother's warning kept making itself known in her head. Both she and Xena were probably going through a sexual phase: Some sort of exploration of their friendships and were channeling it through each other's bodies. They were being tested and… Who was she kidding? She was immensely in love with her best friend and knew Xena just felt the same way. She just wondered whether adding sex and romance to their already intense friendship would make it all the more…real? Accepting Xena's love meant the even greater fear of losing her – again. She'd already lost her once, two moons ago and the thought of going through that again… Gabrielle shuddered, lost in her own morbid thoughts until she smiled suddenly as she both felt and heard Xena's light snoring against her back. The small blast of air coming from behind made her realize how much she did in fact love this woman with all that she was. 'Oooh… this feels good,' she thought, unconsciously impaling herself further onto Xena's finger…

'Wake the goon up and stop being a hedonist', her inner voice mentally slapped her. Oh, but the idea of driving herself to orgasm was so alluring. Her eyes popped open once more and it hit her like a harsh slap in the face.

This was all just temptation.

Her mother had been right all along. Her body was hedonistically craving Xena like a drug. The fates were testing her.

Too stubborn to let the tears fall from her eyes, Gabrielle attempted to wake up her friend for the second time.

"Xena?" No reply again. A crease folded in the blonde's forehead. It didn't usually take this long to wake Xena up – her attentiveness during sleep had often saved both their lives. Then she remembered her companion falling asleep during a story the night before. Ah, that's right. Xena had been exhausted after the strenuous battle against Axon's men. They were really causing problems; raiding mostly. Taking down small farming villages. What was worse, it was close to home. After just crossing the river Hebros, south of Thrace, the travelers were getting closer to Doriskos, a large fishing town. Gabrielle was looking forward to a real bed, no matter the conditions of the inn itself. Although Amphipolis was leagues away, the bard could tell that her companion was becoming restless at the thought of the rapidly moving swarm of mercenaries approaching her hometown. Axon was making this personal and the recent tension around Xena's eyes concerned the blonde.

"Xena!"

"Mmm?" The throaty, dangerously saucy murmur replied from behind her.

"Your…um..your hand," she tried to be as delicate as she could.

"What?" The voice croaked. Gabrielle could almost see the furrowed brow and the confused little scowl on her friend's face. Too embarrassed, she stayed silent, waiting for Xena to figure it out for herself.

"My han.." Xena paused mid-sentence and her eyes popped open as Gabrielle's had ten minutes prior. A squawk escaped from her throat as she realized where her very fortunate hand was in fact situated. She wrenched her hand away from Gabrielle, causing the bard to wince at the unpleasant feeling. Hearing the hiss of pain coming from her friend freaked Xena out even more and she jumped up from both embrace and the goatskin bedroll. "I, ughh… I'm sorry, I..." and with that short stuttered string of words, the usually stoic, fierce warrior vanished, hopping away in search of a cold lake.


	2. We Need To Talk

[A.N: Thank you to the great reviews for this story. I admit it's quite a long time since I wrote the first chapter and half of this one. Either way, I know my style of writing has changed but I'm going to try and keep the same theme. Follow me (at)miekhead on twitter for more updates.]

xoxoxoxoxox

Xena sat in the pond she had found and thought about the incident. Although shocking in every way, what disturbed Xena most was that this was not the first time. The lack of control during sleep when in a close proximity with Gabrielle drove her crazy and she angrily cursed her libido for threatening the best friendship she'd ever had. She knew when it had all started – that damned kiss. It was supposed to be a goodbye kiss. Just in case.

Just in case she wouldn't come back after she'd died. But that chaste yet soft exploration of her little bard's lips had unleashed all the emotions she felt for the young woman.

Of course, they hadn't talked about it. They never did about anything intimate. She knew it was fear of the unknown – for both of them.

Deciding that the water had eradicated any remaining arousal, the warrior got up, letting the cold droplets stream down her bare body. She waded through the rippling water and threw on her still sweat soaked shift.

As she'd guessed, the blonde woman was acting as if nothing had happened; running a hand through her long, sun bleached blonde tresses.

Preparing their substantial oatmeal breakfast, Gabrielle glanced up at her friend and smiled. Yet the smile, despite itself, had not quite reached Gabrielle's eyes. There was a tension around the green orbs suggesting an unwanted awkwardness. Xena didn't know how to react to this, so she grinned back shyly, attempting to get the all-too-sudden feel of her sidekick's moist inner walls out of her mind.

Four candlemarks later, the women were trudging through forestland, getting closer to Doriskos with every step they took.

Gabrielle opened her mouth to say something, but decided not to for the fifteenth time over the last league traveled. After waking up several times in amorous situations with Xena, this was by far the most embarrassing. What made it worse, was that this time, she was that close to waking Xena up and making her finish what she'd started. That close… She let out a frustrated breath and focused on the road ahead of her.

"What were you going to say?"

"Nothing. Just that it's too quiet and… It's too quiet." The bard fell silent again and sighed, feeling a desolate gap already forming between the two of them. Xena glanced at her friend and she felt herself go through the same mutual, emotional turmoil. Gods we are so damned stubborn. Thinking of the only way to cure the awkwardness besides the obvious – and that was just risking way too much, she reached out and wrapped her arm around the smaller woman's waist, pulling her closer towards her. Gabrielle beamed a smile for the first time in days and returned the gesture, snuggling into the embrace, glad of the warrior's comforting offer.

"Well isn't this touching." A raspy voice spoke from behind them. Xena whirled around to find roughly thirteen foul-smelling, sullied, armed men. The barely visible blue and green colors of Axon peeked through the mud and sweat that caked each man.

"Doesn't Axon understand by now that sending men to me is a waste?" Xena snarled, rattled that she hadn't sensed the brigands' rude onset. This distraction has got to stop, she scolded herself.

Axon's second in command, Kosmas, glanced at Xena, moving his eyes from his eyes to Gabrielle, who leant against her companion. "So it would seem." He raised his eyebrow at both of them.

Xena snapped. Her pride was battered by his remark and she felt her privacy intruded so she lashed out. He unsheathed his jagged edged sword and charged at her. A quick glance at Gabrielle told her that the storyteller was successfully dumping her slow opponents on their behinds. Curling her leg around the back of Kosmas's, Xena quickly took his legs from under him. With the wind abruptly knocked out of him as he landed on his back, the large man lay motionless. Recovering his composure, he moved to jump up but found himself stopped by a six foot female warrior straddling his chest. She placed her sword blade against the flesh of his neck.

Xena's eyes searched around hastily, finding the blonde thwacking her staff against a soldier's skull. Good. Going in for the kill, Xena increased the pressure of the blade against her enemy's throat. It was empowering. Empowering to notice the gradual trickle of blood trailing down Kosmas's clavicle, the gash just below his epiglottis spurting the tepid liquid. Staring him in the face as she felt a crush of bone, she glanced up once more to see how her bard was doing. Xena's head suddenly snapped back against her shoulders as the second in command tangled his grubby fingers through her long raven hair from behind her back, yanking it as hard as he could muster. In frantic desperation from having his throat broken and cut open, he slashed as much flesh as he could, gurgling in both pain and determination.

Xena felt the hot burning sting of her opponent's dagger cutting a slice into her cheek. She leaped off him in reflex, another searing pain shooting through her upper arm as the jagged blade lacerated through her skin. In blind fury, she took a chance and dove forward, her sword aiming for his gut while she landed once more on the dirty fighter. She was too quick for him and her sword buried itself into Kosmas's chest as well as the ground beneath him. His greasy brown hair was plastered against his face and his cheeks, and his eyes glazed over, gazing hauntingly up at Xena. Getting off of him as fast as she could, she unhooked the chakram, which up until now was had been hung at her hip. She glanced to both her right and left, swiftly calculating the angles in her mind. Sensing movement behind her, she delivered a forceful punch to her aggressor. She felt him slump against her back, and then heard him plummeting to the ground out cold. She didn't even want to see his face. Bringing her arm back with a power and strength that baffled most Xena released the chakram with an implausible force. As she took down the remaining eight brigands with the lethal spinning disc, she felt hot jets of blood dripping from her cheek.

The tip of the grizzly soldier's blade had efficiently cut open the fleshy cheek tissue from the base of Xena's lower left eyelid to her mid cheek, aligned with her mouth. The steady flow of blood in her line of vision made her light headed. Shaking the blood from her face she saw Gabrielle ducking away from the chakram, which was speedily slicing through the scalps of the remaining men. The last thud sounded as a younger man dressed in blue and green fell to the blood covered ground.

Xena slid heavily down the side of a large tree trunk in exhaustion.

Gabrielle's breath caught as she observed the action, remembering the last time she'd seen the woman she loved do the same thing. Rushing over to the warrior, she knelt down beside her to check the extent of her injuries. Xena's eye were shut, blood was pouring down the whole of the left side of her face. The scarlet stream, in Gabrielle's eyes, made the woman look even more beautifully heroic. Her breathing was regular and she seemed relatively calm. She just looked relieved that the fight was over. And Gabrielle had never seen anything more stunning. Gabrielle breathed a sigh of relief. Hesitantly, she inched her hand closer to Xena's head, light brushing the blood away from the warrior's eyes, the bard leaned closer and brushed her lips against her best friend's forehead. She lingered there, giving her friend as much love as she could through the kiss. Leaning back she gazed at the woman whose closed eyes fluttered open and looked into the sea-green ones with such intensity and devotion, Gabrielle wanted to cry there and then. Xena let a slow grin spread across her face. There was an adolescence that Gabrielle knew was very rare so she mentally took a snap shot of the scene before her and stored it away in her memory. There was also an infectious quality about the smile and she couldn't help but respond with her own nose wrinkle, forever thanking the gods for Xena's safety.

"Ow," Xena murmured in a childish like manner causing her sidekick to chuckle softly.

"How many times have I told you not to play with lacerated blades, Xena?" The bard admonished. She rummaged through her saddlebag, pulling out some cotton gauze, laying it tenderly against Xena's cheek. Looking introspectively for a second, she lost her smile, its fading brisk and she gently continued to absorb the slowly clotting blood using the already sopping cloth.

"Hey," Gabrielle heard the hushed tone, then felt a soft stroking on her forearm and glanced down at herself, then up to capture Xena's questioning gaze.

"Could you not have sat on a rock instead?" Gabrielle's voice broke - her attempt at the sardonic humor failing miserably. Xena stared in confusion until she suddenly realized. Her body spontaneously jerked away from the tree trunk, circling her arms around the blonde's shoulders, drawing her closer. Gabrielle's pulse was beating rapidly and Xena could feel the vibrations through her chest as if they were her own when Gabrielle nuzzled closer, sitting in-between her legs.

"It just reminded me," the small woman choked back a sob.

"I know," Xena soothed, "I'm sorry…" She whispered as she stroked her friend's back. She let a tear fall, the sting of salt hitting her open wound as intense as the emotion.

She thought back to that day. The day she'd just given up, her body lifeless against the trunk as she fell into a semi-conscious state.

Begging Gabrielle to take her to Mount Nestos as a last resort.

She really was sorry. Sorry for causing her best friend so much sadness and it made her heart ache because she knew that the pain wouldn't go for a long, long time.

Xena kissed Gabrielle's forehead lightly, feeling the blonde strands moving against her lips and rested her chin on top of her Gabrielle's head.

Their bodies began to rock gently and although Gabrielle found herself momentarily soothed, a harsh frustration continued to lie deep within her.

"Xena." She attempted to break the embrace but she found herself trapped. "Xena," she repeated insistently. "We need to talk."


End file.
